Last Youthwings Meeting

The church had some changes internally and my cell is being moved to a new tribe. i guess when i first received the news, i was shocked and didnt want to think about it (which i always do). because being with pastor sooksan and the rest, we are familiar with one another and that makes me even not wanting to let go. I struggled through and really didnt want to give up the tribe which im close with and the people whom i made during the past years.

but yet God reminded me of being submissive and giving support to my leader, and partly i didnt want to give up on my gkids also. yesterday we had youthwings meeting - which is my last one, it just hit me that im no longer with the rest, not being involved in the christmas planning etc. to be truthful and honest, i felt sad because there is so much to learn and grow from there and the community where we started off. as much as being the emotional me, God just reassured me in my heart that He always has plans to prosper and not to harm. and for that, im trusting God in the next phase.

and like what valerie shared that pastor started off youthwings quite timely and i must admit that despite me feeling the dread to go each time, i ended up feeling blessed just being there. God has never short-change me and it has always been God who is hanging on to us. im thankful for Pastor, the rest of the sisters and of course God who never fails.

11.14

It is mid-November already. i wander where all the time goes to. hmmmm. kind of looking forward for Christmas, still trying to persuade my dad to get a Christmas tree this year and decorate it with bright lightnings and ornaments.

Ever since school ended like last wed, i have been really free. Sometimes it makes me happy with nothing to do - guiltless hours spend snuggling in bed. being able to sit on the couch and read magazines. especially on rainy days, those can be the best days. however sometimes it gets really bored. i would walk around, looking at the sky, thinking of everything and nothing at the same time.

nevertheless, been trying to tidy up my resume and cover letter (sound v serious isnt it) when i think of my future, it seems like nothing, w/o any anticipation. always trying to avoid questions - so what are you going to do now. just because i dont want to think about it. I guess that is the problem, it all becomes tedious. maybe its time for some serious planning.

Dear God

Dear Mr. God,
I'm writin' You today
Because it seems like lately
I've forgotten how to pray
I know I don't need this pen
But everybody likes to get
A letter now and then
I'm sorry for not writin' more

Chorus:
'Cause I need you
But it's hard to see
Why anyone as big as You
Needs anything from me
I know You're there
So how ya been?
I'm alright but I can't lie,
Sometimes I feel like givin' in
You're all I've got
[ Lyrics from: http://www.lyricsty.com/the-warren-brothers-dear-mr-god-lyrics.html ]
Dear Mr. God,
Sometimes I wish
You lived next door
So over coffee You could tell me
What You started all this for
I guess you saw
That sunrise yesterday
Thanks for the reminder
That You're never gone away
It gives me hope
Telling You what You already know

I need you
But it's hard to see
Why anyone as big as you
Needs anything from me
I know You're there
So how've You Been?
I'm all right but I can't lie
Sometimes I feel like givin' in

Dear Mr. God,
Tell me do You ever cry
When we forget to thank You
For the good things in our lives?
I know I can't always understand
Why You do the things You do
But I know in the end
I'll make it through
If I stand next to You
So here I am

Dear Mr. God,
I'm writin' you today
Because it seems like lately
I've forgotten how to pray

Antoinette

Went over to Antoinette with wunyen for tea :) a really comfy and cosy ambience together with very detailed furniture, making me feel like staying there the whole day! tea was good with very fragrant smell, had salted caramel toast also (vvvv awesome!)

Nothing on you baby